I had so much fun last night even though Janet's brother and I didn't hang out I still had fun, I met a disabled boy who is 18 and he is smart and he passed the mcass <-- that's a test in Mass that you need to pass. My friend Sammy also passed it, and I did. I was telling his parents when I was at MHS I use to be able to do everything but then I went to public school and I ended up in a power chair. I wonder where I would be if they would have kept me? I know that I wouldn't be living here and I wouldn't see Jorma walk around in his boxers, and right now he's getting his breakfast and I know that he doesn't like me in there. I had allot of fun being out, I came home at 11:11pm. In my van there was Janet, Lauren, Stephanie, Nick, his girl friend and his baby boy. It was allot of fun, I forgot that I was disabled. I want and need friends like that who I can go to their houses and stay there until 10pm instead of being here all the time there is nothing to do here. All I do here is do my quotes and bible verses and that's it. I get bored like I've said in the past posts my mom really doesn't interact with me because she's so busy with her life and this morning she didn't offer me breakfast because she and Jorma were so in a rush to watch the Finnish news and drink their coffee and eat their breakfast. She always tells me that I eat to much but when I don't eat she doesn't like that either. Last night while we were there Maiju and her kids and her husband Bret were there and Bret never says "hi" to me. In 2009 when my chair died and my mom was in Finland and he got my chair charger he said "the reason why you have 3:16 on your arm is because you don't know the time".
The fire works were so amazing and I got allot of picture's when the sun was going down it brought tears to my eyes because summer of 1999 I was on the beach with my dad and he said "when the sun goes down, I go too". I didn't understand that until December 23rd,1999 he died at 6:03. I am very glad that I had him as a dad, he taught me so much and how to live. He would be proud of the woman that I've grown up to be, I'm in pain right now but I'm going to church right now. I like going, I love the worship music you cannot fall asleep at the born again Christian churches the music and everyone is so upbeat :). I was on the phone with Dawn yesterday and she said "I found pictures of when you Jenny and I went to the bar and then when Brie, Amy you and I had the party and drank and then at shake a leg." She told me that when we were leaving the bar & club that night I wanted to bring a guy back to the dorms. Shake a leg was a two week program where they taught you to be independent even though you are disabled. Those two weeks were so much fun we went sailing and did all these fun things, the last day there I got really close to the staff and when I left I cried but now they've all moved on. That's one bad thing about these summer programs you meet some awesome people but then saying goodbye to them that's not easy. The last day at MHS when they announced that all seniors to go pack your things I cried because I knew that my life was going to be different. Now half the people that I use to be close to they've moved on and are kind of stuck up. Or they're in day programs such as Alycia, she's so smart but her mom doesn't want to deal with her so when she came back from MHS she was put into a day program and into a group home and that's where I am very thankful that my mom didn't put me into a group home all though she wanted to put me in a day program but I will never go in one.
I went to church today and I was in so much pain and then this lady came and said to me "you're a pretty impressive young lady, I see you go every where your self." I said "my dad died when I was 16 and he taught me how to live even though I am this disabled and every night when I go to bed I thank God for him because the things that he taught me I'll never forget and he always called me his chocolate queen and to this day I still love chocolate and my pca's want to smack him for naming me that because I have it every where in my room and when I go to stores I always buy it" and she laughed. It's true he taught me how to live even though I am this disabled and I am so thankful for him and I do miss him as I said before he held this whole family together. But my dad is in a better place and I know that he is proud of me for what I've done how I go places and I don't let my disabilities stop me and how I never gave up on God even though I have these 3 disabilities
I always like staying after church and talk with the different people and I know that I inspire allot of them, I am always in pain and spasm but I still go to church every Sunday and I don't let my pain or spasm stop me. I like going it gets my mind off the bad and onto the good so that part I really like, everyone loves me at horizon church and they always say "love you" and I always say "love you too". They did the song "the stand by hillsong and that's one of my favorite songs by them so is inside out. I never thought that I would like all this worship music but I do. I was use to the slow music and not the upbeat music, all though when Dale was with me she did take me to her drum practice and there I did get to listen to the upbeat music. I wish that my sister's would give the born again church a try but they are so worried about leaving the faith that it would be a sin to leave the church but it's better and I like it :). But if the slow style they like oh well it's not my place to try and change them
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