How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! Psalms 113:1
My friend Sammy her mom babies her, she goes to collage but I don't like the way she treats Sammy. She doesn't let her go any where without her, my mom lets me go every where myself. When I go grocery shopping with my mom or Steph they won't reach things for me or if I go shopping with them. At MHS they taught us how to go grocery shopping ourselves and we weren't allowed to ask people to reach things if we could reach them. Disabled people are human just because our legs they don't work our minds still do. I am going grocery shopping with Steph today and she helps me get the things that I can't reach, tomorrow for lunch I am going to have her make me honey bbq chicken and corn on the cob on the gril. It is important that Steph and my mom keep my indepence. I buy these drink packets & water bottles so that I can fill them myself, I do allot for myself. Dawn said that she thinks that Sammy's mom probably doesn't like me hanging out with her because I encourage her to do things by herself. Sammy wants to hang out with me but her mom doesn't want her too and it's to bad. My mom asked me "when you go to market basket can you buy yogurt & bread?" I said "yeah" she's always buying me things. I wonder why Sammy's mom treats her like a baby, she never lets her hang out with her friends and she didn't even get her high school diploma even though she passed the state test.
Once again Jorma put me down, Steph and I came home and he showed me a picture when I was in my manual wheelchair and he said "I miss that girl" and the tears came. I don't want to be in this in this stupid power chair I didn't choose to be in it, Steph said "it's okay". But she doesn't understand what it's like to be me, I use to be able to do everything and now I am stuck in this power chair. I am sick of his stupid comments, I wish he would keep them to him self. He has the enemy and it's sad to see my mom to be in that relationship. This is what I wrote to him: "Jorma, I didn't choose to be in this power chair every day I wish my dad was alive I wish I had a rewind button when I wasn't this disabled." When I went to give it to him he threw it away, I am so sick of him!!
Last night I let Bryan who I was going to marry call me and that was the biggest mistake because he kept saying "I love you" he has lied to me so many times. He's told me that he's gotten accepted to Fitchburg state and that he got a colostomy. He was telling me "I am a born again Christian but I don't believe him because on his face book wall he has the f word and he's holding beer. He wasn't listening to me what I was saying, he kept telling me "I love you", I've changed allot in the past 6 years, I have no desire to drink or use all these bad words. Dawn and I we use to swear allot but now that we're born again we quit doing all of that. I still listen to non Christian bands but nothing like before, I knew Jorma still drank I am disabled but I am not stupid. Bryan said "I miss holding and hugging you". In 2006 when I went back to camp this kid Justin started to like me and I broke up with Bryan and I sent the ring back that he gave me. I should have never given him my number. I know he wants me back, but he's lied to me so many times. When I go help out at church tomorrow night I am going to see if there's any single guys. I want a guy who will be honest with me and not always lie to me, I've done allot of growing up.
This afternoon Steph came and got my purse and my mom told her that we couldn't go to the super walmart because of the gas. So we went to the walmart the next town over from me. I want to ask the pastor if I can have a bunch of girls come here on a Friday night and my friend Courtney could help me. We could play games and have fun, and each week they could pick out a bible verse that they want to share with us. Each week someone could make something such as: brownies, cookies. Now that it's going to be summer time we can sit outside, my mom doesn't like how I go to barns and noble but when I am here she wants me gone. I want to get more human interaction, last week Steph was going to do an over night but I knew my mom wouldn't like it. She doesn't like when I am out too much but when I am here she doesn't want to do anything with me. This afternoon when I stuck up for myself when Jorma made his comment and I wrote him the letter and he didn't even bother to read it. I'm burnt out by the both of them, when I go to church everyone jokes around with me. But like I've said before Finnish people are very serious, when I go back to the Lutheran services I get so bored. Horizon always says "here comes trouble or speedy" they named me speedy. When I am able to drive down to my church alone my mom doesn't like how I take my headphones but if I could drive then I would have my music. My mom puts down that she is my pca but she doesn't really do anything with me. I wish that she would have not let Jorma back, he lived in Mary's basement before so I am not sure why he can't live there again. My mom always wants my showers done in the morning but Jorma takes showers and the water goes cold. Steph doesn't know how I deal with all this but God helps me and I am thankful that he is in my life
Healing Begins
Tenth Avenue North
So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside
So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear
So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now
Oh This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us
This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
Come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
My friend Sammy her mom babies her, she goes to collage but I don't like the way she treats Sammy. She doesn't let her go any where without her, my mom lets me go every where myself. When I go grocery shopping with my mom or Steph they won't reach things for me or if I go shopping with them. At MHS they taught us how to go grocery shopping ourselves and we weren't allowed to ask people to reach things if we could reach them. Disabled people are human just because our legs they don't work our minds still do. I am going grocery shopping with Steph today and she helps me get the things that I can't reach, tomorrow for lunch I am going to have her make me honey bbq chicken and corn on the cob on the gril. It is important that Steph and my mom keep my indepence. I buy these drink packets & water bottles so that I can fill them myself, I do allot for myself. Dawn said that she thinks that Sammy's mom probably doesn't like me hanging out with her because I encourage her to do things by herself. Sammy wants to hang out with me but her mom doesn't want her too and it's to bad. My mom asked me "when you go to market basket can you buy yogurt & bread?" I said "yeah" she's always buying me things. I wonder why Sammy's mom treats her like a baby, she never lets her hang out with her friends and she didn't even get her high school diploma even though she passed the state test.
Each Day Is A Brand New Opportunity To Be Jesus To The World
Last night I let Bryan who I was going to marry call me and that was the biggest mistake because he kept saying "I love you" he has lied to me so many times. He's told me that he's gotten accepted to Fitchburg state and that he got a colostomy. He was telling me "I am a born again Christian but I don't believe him because on his face book wall he has the f word and he's holding beer. He wasn't listening to me what I was saying, he kept telling me "I love you", I've changed allot in the past 6 years, I have no desire to drink or use all these bad words. Dawn and I we use to swear allot but now that we're born again we quit doing all of that. I still listen to non Christian bands but nothing like before, I knew Jorma still drank I am disabled but I am not stupid. Bryan said "I miss holding and hugging you". In 2006 when I went back to camp this kid Justin started to like me and I broke up with Bryan and I sent the ring back that he gave me. I should have never given him my number. I know he wants me back, but he's lied to me so many times. When I go help out at church tomorrow night I am going to see if there's any single guys. I want a guy who will be honest with me and not always lie to me, I've done allot of growing up.
This afternoon Steph came and got my purse and my mom told her that we couldn't go to the super walmart because of the gas. So we went to the walmart the next town over from me. I want to ask the pastor if I can have a bunch of girls come here on a Friday night and my friend Courtney could help me. We could play games and have fun, and each week they could pick out a bible verse that they want to share with us. Each week someone could make something such as: brownies, cookies. Now that it's going to be summer time we can sit outside, my mom doesn't like how I go to barns and noble but when I am here she wants me gone. I want to get more human interaction, last week Steph was going to do an over night but I knew my mom wouldn't like it. She doesn't like when I am out too much but when I am here she doesn't want to do anything with me. This afternoon when I stuck up for myself when Jorma made his comment and I wrote him the letter and he didn't even bother to read it. I'm burnt out by the both of them, when I go to church everyone jokes around with me. But like I've said before Finnish people are very serious, when I go back to the Lutheran services I get so bored. Horizon always says "here comes trouble or speedy" they named me speedy. When I am able to drive down to my church alone my mom doesn't like how I take my headphones but if I could drive then I would have my music. My mom puts down that she is my pca but she doesn't really do anything with me. I wish that she would have not let Jorma back, he lived in Mary's basement before so I am not sure why he can't live there again. My mom always wants my showers done in the morning but Jorma takes showers and the water goes cold. Steph doesn't know how I deal with all this but God helps me and I am thankful that he is in my life
Healing Begins
Tenth Avenue North
So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside
So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear
So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now
Oh This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us
This is where the healing begins
This is where the healing starts
Come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
No comments:
Post a Comment